Sure thing, here’s a reimagined version of that article with the quirks and chaos infused:
You ever have one of those days where the news just seems to spin in circles and you can’t quite make heads or tails of it? Yeah, so, Christopher Waller, he’s with the Fed—big deal, right?—drops this nugget about maybe, just maybe, they’ll cut interest rates by July. And boom, markets do their usual dance. Stocks jump up like a kid on sugar, but long-term bonds? They went up instead of down. Go figure.
Waller’s saying he’s got a bit of a soft spot for the labor market woes over the whole tariff drama from way back in Trump times. Tariffs—those sneaky little fees on imports—could jack up prices a smidge, but companies were like squirrel hoarders, stockpiling imports before those kicked in. So, possibly, maybe, it won’t be a price wildfire. But who knows, right?
Oh, and oil. Yeah. It’s creeping up again. Since, when? May 5? Shot up nearly $20—ouch—and we’re all feeling it at the gas pump. There’s this looming “what if” about a bigger dust-up in the Middle East—like déjà vu of the ’70s, only with better music now, I guess.
Speaking of repeat history, Waller mused on the growing jobless rates among young graduates. Computer science kids might as well be studying typewriter repair, with AI snapping up coding gigs faster than I can lose my keys. It’s like the push for coding has hit a brick wall because—surprise—AI’s the new voracious bookworm.
And let’s not gloss over how the Fed might’ve screwed the pooch back in ‘74. Inflation cooled its heels for a minute, and bam, they cut rates. Result? Inflation kicked back in like an uninvited guest. Waller contemplates the stability mismatch—trust me, it sounds fancier than it feels—about why rush to cut when unemployment’s just chilling where it’s at?
Waller gave a side-eye to the idea that trimming rates would help the national debt burdens that Trump suggested. Kudos to him for saying, “Ain’t my circus, ain’t my monkeys,” more or less. That’s a Congress and White House juggling act if I ever saw one.
Mix in some dicey tax policies, geopolitical stress, maybe tack in a retro-grade replay of policy blunders (please no!), and I’m smelling a whiff of the ‘70s creepin’ back. Stagflation—it’s got a nasty ring, don’t it? Powell’s got a more diplomatic whisper on that topic, bless him.
You ever hear “Those who forget history are condemned to repeat it”? Or was it more like, history’s got a catchy beat? Me, I’d rather hum along to Karen Carpenter. “It’s Yesterday Once More”? Fingers crossed it’s not a trend. 🤞
